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My Life...at the Olde Burley village

As a special birthday - age not included - surprise to me fair lady, I whisked her away for a weekend in the country. I chose the village o...

Tuesday 24 March 2015

50 Shades of Beige - A Searing Expose of the Secret Sex Lives of the Over Fifties - Part Two

A Searing Expose of the Secret Sex Lives of the Over Fifties, in Swinging Suburbia.

Part Two – Swing if You're Happy that Way

George, looked at their newly arrived guest, momentarily transfixed – like a deer, caught in the headlights - unable to react for fear of being struck down by Lucinda's, own set of super-troopers. It was a variation of the “ Fight or Flight” response, but with a slight change to the options. She had that affect on people – men in particular – whenever she made a grand entrance, a first meeting or simply by the way she said, 
“ Good-morning, Boys !” Lucinda Harris - Lulu, to her closest friends - was a veritable force of nature, with a couple of interesting artificial points thrown in for good measure. Her body was made up of so many dangerous curves, that she was constantly being grabbed by the 'fuzz.' The local police were always pulling Lucinda over, slapping her with their hard citations, she had even been pinched undercover, on the odd occasion. 
Lucinda liked to let people believe she was of Italian descent – well her mother did use to fantasize about Dean Martin when making love to her father. But, her parents actually originated from the valley, a puritan couple, who liked to sing, enjoy the odd drink, worshiped Rugby and really loved to ….well, they loved all eleven of their children. 
  Lucinda, was two thirds convent girl and one third...home schooled, the authorities agreeing it safer, for all parties concerned.  She was the only known private school-girl in history to be expelled for 
" inciting public disobedience " by the ... PUPILS !
   She walked tall – 6 inch stiletto heels were shoehorned into her genetic make-up – and proud, carrying everything before her with just a little behind, for balance. Her hair was dark and lustrous except for an inexplicable white Mallen streak emblazoned from the front to the back of her head. She was always well presented, professionally coiffured, delicately perfumed, an expensive looking wardrobe and strategically positioned jewellery - even her walk was by .. design. Lucinda was a career wife, a position which she was currently accepting prospective future offers, re: husband, number 5. Her companion for the evening was simply known as Adam, a distinguished looking gentleman, whose age was apparently wage related - his wealth took years off him.
Their had arrived earlier than most as Lucinda felt largely responsible for this evenings affair - ever since she had revealed herself to Angela as something of a mover and shaker in the secret world of the suburban swing setters. It was a bold move on Lucinda's part, revealing herself in this matter, but she had been a friend of Angela's from almost the first day that she had moved into the close, some 17 years ago. Recently she had been listening – and sympathizing – to Angela, as she opened up about her sex life, or what impersonated as one. Life had increased it's working hours, whilst intimacy had suffered a reduction in demand. One home, two people, three children, five grandchildren and a sixty hour working week, didn't leave much time for the imagination or each other. After listening – for years – to Lucinda's tales of the sexual explicit, revealing some of the more personal facets of her boudoir life, excitement, untamed passion, fantasy, bondage and wild jungle animal lust. Angela would just sit there and take it all in, hardly able to believe that it was actually possible for real people to live life so.....free. Then, one grey day Lucinda decided to plan an intervention on her friend's behalf, in the form of a sex party. She was already “familiar” with some of her fellow residents of Little Hampton Close, and knew that a few of them were also playing around with each other. From there, it was just a small jump to think about bringing them all together, in one big bash ! So, it came to pass that one evening, while they were having another of their all-girl, tete-a-tete's, Lucinda, suggested to Angela, that she & George, should “host” an informal come as you are...swingers party ! To see if they were ready to tip their toes, in the murky extra-marital waters, of mixed doubles.
George, shook his head, self-consciously aware that time may have passed him, at a slightly faster rate than the “ Outside World.“ - as it so often appeared whenever he gazed upon Lucinda's form. He briefly rubbed his chin to see if he could feel the arrival of a beard, during his recent A.W.O.L from this little Kitchen-Sink based drama.
At this point, both ladies turned towards George, as if expecting to see some sign of physical reaction – from either of their fronts - or possible any pearls of wisdom, from this male member currently standing before them. “ I...I.... I, was just going to pour a drink, would you care to join us ? “ stumbled George, finally. 
Lucinda, prized herself free from the – now – derailed sliding doors and headed towards the kitchen cabinet.     “ I'll get the glasses, you know how I like it, don't you handsome ?... “ Lucinda playfully teased George, “long, cool and 100% “
"Tough ! You'll take what I've got... small, luke-warm and mild,” George served back.
"Uggghh ! The service here leaves a lot to be desired. I have no other course of action open to me. l shall have to go over your head, and appeal to a higher power. Angela ! you simply must do something about your staff situation ! “ Lucinda warmly, joked with her friend.
" I don't understand it, the lady at the agency assured me that he had 'glowing testimonials'. Plus, he was available at short notice, and for all occasions – weddings, birthdays even the odd BAR MITZVAH !” Angela's spirit raised, slightly.
“ What's an “ODD Bar Mitzvah ?” queried Lucinda.
“ A Girl's one ! “ snapped George.
“ " Listen, just pour the drink, Chuckles ! As long as it's wet, I suppose, I won't complain. In the meantime, I need a word with your wife. Now, Angela, there are two points I need to raise with you, my lady. One: What are you doing hiding out here, when you should be out there...” Lucinda fingered towards the bright lights of the living room, “ ...in a more, front of house position by now. You're guests are coming, and need to see more of you, they want your welcoming face and guiding hand. It's so very important that everyone knows exactly where they stand – or lay – with each other, right from the beginning. And, secondly Darling....just why exactly, are you so, well ....naked ?”



To be continued...
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